Movies love to tell us that growing up ends the moment you graduate high school. For most of us, that’s when things actually get confusing. You leave home, start working, maybe move to a new place (maybe more than once like in my case) and now all of a sudden you’re supposed to know who you are. Spoiler: you usually don’t.
That’s why stories like “My Oxford Year” and “The Life List” hit so close to home. They show people still figuring themselves out in their 20s and 30s.
It’s strange how many movies forget the part of life where we experience hard times like heartbreaks or career troubles. Teenagers get all the big speeches and life lessons, but adults go through new versions of those same feelings. It doesn’t stop once you hit 18. You just stop getting credit for it.
We need more stories that say, “Hey, you’re still growing, and that’s okay.” No one actually wakes up one day and feels like they’re exactly who they want to be, nothing more to be done. You can be 32 and still feel like you’re figuring out what you want to do with your life.
When movies show adults still growing up, it gives everyone permission to be a little gentler with themselves. It tells us it’s fine to take our time to figure ourselves out, to mess up or change our minds and to start over.
Coming-of-age should not be boxed into high school hallways and first crushes. It can happen during a breakup at 27 or when you switch careers at 35. Growth isn’t a one-time event.
Maybe we never stop “coming of age,” and instead we just stop calling it that. Movies could help remind us that growing up isn’t about reaching some end goal we made up when we were in high school. It ‘s about curiosity, staying open minded and being willing to start over again, no matter how old you are.
